how to stop compulsive shopping woman holding credit card and colorful shopping bags

How to Stop Compulsive Shopping and Curb the Urge to Spend

/8 Comments/in , , /by Mary Hunt

Ever head into a store for one thing—paper towels, maybe—and somehow wind up at checkout with a scented candle, a new sweater, and a gadget you’re not even sure how to use? Been there. Learning how to stop compulsive shopping isn’t about shame or swearing off fun. It’s about finding smart ways to outwit those tempting urges. These six practical (and slightly cheeky) strategies have helped me make peace with my own inner shopper, and might just do the trick for you, too.

how to stop compulsive shopping woman holding credit card and colorful shopping bags

Key Points

  • Compulsive shopping isn’t about loving stuff. It’s about the emotional charge behind the purchase.
  • Avoiding slippery shopping situations and carrying only cash can help you stay grounded and in control.
  • Real change starts when you dig into the “why” behind the urge and learn how to outsmart it with grace.

As a compulsive shopper, I’ve come to accept that those tendencies will likely always be part of who I am. Thankfully, I’ve learned how to stop compulsive shopping before it gets the best of me, and in some cases, I’ve even made those old urges work in my favor.

When it came time to hand out compulsive tendencies, I must’ve been first in line and double-dipped. I can sit down to watch the evening news and, without leaving the couch, somehow end up the proud new owner of a pasta machine I didn’t know existed fifteen minutes earlier.

I’ve jumped online just to “look around” and emerged with three outfits I’ll never wear, a gift I forgot to give, and a few “too good to pass up” household gadgets. And don’t even get me started on catalogs. In the time it takes to open the mail, Adirondack chairs and matching windsocks are already on their way to my front porch.

Why? Because when I see something I like—WHAM!—something goes off in my head that says, “Yes, you need that. Right now. You’ve earned it!” And heaven help the poor soul who tries to suggest otherwise.

What Is Compulsive Shopping and Why It Happens

It turns out there’s more to this behavior than simply liking pretty things or loving a good deal. According to researchers, compulsive buying disorder is very real and surprisingly common, affecting nearly 6% of adults in the U.S. It often starts in our late teens or early twenties, right around the time we’re handed our first credit card and start calling the shots on how we spend.

CBD, as it’s known in clinical circles, isn’t about loving to shop; it’s about feeling powerless not to. It’s often tied to emotional triggers like anxiety, boredom, or even low self-worth, and it’s frequently paired with other conditions like depression, substance abuse, or impulse control disorders. Some people experience a buildup of tension or unease that only gets released when they make a purchase. That rush of relief is real, but unfortunately, so is the guilt that follows.

None of this is to say there’s a “shopping personality” or that we’re doomed to shop ‘til we drop. But it does help explain why some of us are more prone to splurging, even when we know better. Understanding the why behind those behaviors can be a powerful step toward change. In my case, it’s helped me recognize my triggers, build new habits, and avoid the slippery places where I’m most likely to fall face-first into a pile of clearance candles and throw pillows.

Strategy #1: Self-Parenting Your Inner Shopper

When I feel that familiar tug to toss something unnecessary into my cart, I ask myself a simple question: Would I accept this behavior from my kids? Imagining myself face down in the aisle at HomeGoods, flailing like a toddler mid-meltdown, is all it takes to snap me back to reality. That mental image, equal parts hilarious and horrifying, reminds me that grown-up me is in charge, not the impulse-happy child version who wants everything right now. Sometimes all it takes is a little tough love from yourself to yourself to stay on track.

Strategy #2: Avoid Slippery Shopping Situations

Some places are just plain dangerous—for my wallet, that is. Stores, shopping channels, slick ads, and glossy catalogs? All slippery places for me. Just setting foot (or eyeball) in those zones can send me sliding straight into a purchase I’ll regret. So, I steer clear. When I do need something specific, I plan my route like a Navy SEAL: in, out, no detours. I’ve blocked tempting websites on my devices and keep a trash can near the mailbox. Catalogs go straight in, no peeking. Out of sight, out of mind… and out of budgetary danger.

Strategy #3: Make Spending Difficult on Purpose

Carrying a credit card, or worse, a checkbook, is just too convenient for me. And by “convenient,” I mean one step away from financial freefall. My modus operandi? I carry only enough cash to cover my anticipated needs for the day. That’s it. No wiggle room. It forces me to plan ahead, think twice, and weigh each purchase more carefully. Turns out, when you have to physically hand over cash, it stings a little more and that sting can be a powerful deterrent against impulse buys you’ll regret later.

Strategy #4: Talk Yourself Out of It

When temptation strikes, I’ve learned to have a little heart-to-heart with myself. I ask questions like, “If this weren’t on sale, would you still want it?” (Usually not.) “Why don’t you go home and think it over first?” (I almost never go back.) “Don’t you already own something that does the job?” (Nine times out of ten, I do.) And my favorite: “Are you buying this just to prove you can? Because newsflash—no one’s watching.” Giving myself a reality check in the moment helps me pump the brakes before I end up with yet another regret hiding in the back of the closet.

Strategy #5: Saving Money Is the Best High

I’ve discovered something surprising: saving money gives me the same kind of rush as spending, only without the guilt hangover. For me, setting aside cash or watching my savings grow produces a kind of euphoria that’s just as satisfying as snagging a deal… and way more rewarding in the long run. The difference? Saving leaves me feeling proud and in control, while overspending tends to come with a side of remorse. Turns out, watching your money work for you is a much better thrill than watching it disappear.

Strategy #6: Dig Into the Root Cause

That relentless urge to buy, buy, buy? It’s rarely just about the stuff. For many of us, it’s a mask, covering up deeper issues like anxiety, loneliness, or in my case, a need for approval. Once I connected the dots between my shopping habits and that emotional root, everything started to make more sense, and more importantly, I could finally begin to make real changes.

Reading solid self-help books, having honest conversations, and leaning on wise counselors gave me the clarity (and courage) to face what was really going on. Understanding why I shop has been just as important as learning how to stop.

Get Support and Take the First Step Toward Change

If you suspect your shopping habits have crossed the line from “occasional splurge” to something that feels out of control, please know there’s no shame in that, and there’s also real help available. A great first step is to visit www.debtorsanonymous.org and take their self-test. It’s simple, private, and can offer insight into whether you might be dealing with compulsive spending or debting.

Remember, you’re not broken. You’re not alone. And you can make changes that bring lasting relief. Every big turnaround starts with one small step.

 

Question: What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever bought on a total impulse and did you regret it or love it forever? Let’s hear those shopping confessionals!

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

More from Everyday Cheapskate

woman walking with basket down store aisle grocery items with the biggest price increases

5 Grocery Items Seeing the Biggest Price Increases Now

when to open and close windows to keep house cool

The “Open It or Close It” Rule That Lowers Your Power Bill

frugal habits that save money

13 Frugal Habits That Don’t Feel Frugal at All

budget-friendly home improvements to increase sales price

Before You List: 12 Easy Wins to Boost Your Sale Price

happy children in car

Careful the Kids are Watching! Raising Financially Responsible Kids at Home

borrowing from your retirement account piggy bank and wood cutout of retired couple

Why Borrowing From 401(k)s Backfires More Than You Think

generic vs name brand woman choosing between two cereals in grocery store aisle

6 Winners in the Generic vs. Name-Brand Showdown

woman holding grocery shopping list on phone how to save money on groceries

18 Easy Ways to Save Money on Groceries in 2026

hand holding an orange credit card up opt out of credit card interest rate increase

Should You Opt Out of a Credit Card Rate Hike?



Please keep your comments positive, encouraging, helpful, brief,
and on-topic in keeping with EC Commenting Guidelines



Caught yourself reading all the way 'til the end? Why not share with a friend.

8 replies
  1. Laurie says:

    “CBD, as it’s known in clinical circles, isn’t about loving to shop; it’s about feeling powerless not to. It’s often tied to emotional triggers like anxiety, boredom, or even low self-worth, and it’s frequently paired with other conditions like depression, substance abuse, or impulse control disorders. Some people experience a buildup of tension or unease that only gets released when they make a purchase. That rush of relief is real, but unfortunately, so is the guilt that follows.” Wow. Mary – this statement hit me like an ice cold bucket of water in the face. Anxiety, low self-worth, depression, and impulse control disorder have all been clinically ascribed to me. I just never knew about this connection. Understanding this has set me on a quest to get it under control. DebtorsAnonymous here I come. Now if you can only advise me how to clean out my closet which is stuffed to the gills and be ok with letting go. I am so grateful.

    Reply
  2. Mimi says:

    My strategies:
    1) With catalogs I usually fold down the corner of the page that has something that caught my eye. And I let the publication sit around for a while. Usually after a few days or weeks the item no longer has appeal to me.
    2) Nowadays with Internet I find myself on Amazon. I put the item in my cart and then transfer it to the save for later or a shopping list I’ve made. It sits there for a bit and next time or two I view the list 90% of the time I no longer have a desire for it. These two “tricks” have helped me immensely. Maybe these tricks can help someone else

    Reply
  3. Cate says:

    Mary, Many years ago, you shared six questions to ask myself when buying anything. I am blessed not to have a compulsion to buy, but I was very poor at the time and you truly helped me with that pause. I’m sharing it back with you, today.
    CAN I AFFORD IT?
    DO I REALLY NEED IT?
    DO I NEED IT NOW?
    DO I HAVE SOMETHING LIKE IT ALREADY?
    CAN I FIND A CHEAPER SUBSTITUTE?
    IS THIS THE BEST DEAL?
    You are a brave and wonderful person. Thank you.

    Reply
  4. Rachael M says:

    I appreciate your experience and the wisdom gained from your experiences you share with us every day. In this particular blog, I appreciate you mentioning Debtors Anonymous as a possible solution to the problem of compulsive spending. Your 6 things would be very helpful to someone AFTER they’ve recovered sanity from compulsive spending and the problem has been removed.

    Reply
  5. Jianne says:

    It’s hard to understand the reasoning for the numerous ads in your column as you are explaining how to stop compulsive shopping. How can we stop all these ads?

    Reply
    • Mary Hunt says:

      You would say goodbye to Everyday Cheapskate. It’s in your inbox every morning year round. And has been for several decades. It’s free but very costly—in excess of $100,000 a year. Not sure where you would want me to find that kind of money to pay the bills. Ads provide the resources for us to do what we do here every day. 7 days a week. 365 days a year …

      Reply
  6. linda says:

    not being into trying new recipes [my son is the family cook], i didn’t save your e-mail that featured things to do with cake mix. three days after i deleted it, a friend mentioned that she wished she could find something to do with cake mix to liven it up a bit. duh. my deleted items had already emptied and i don’t know how to use your archives. please help!

    Reply
    • Mary Hunt says:

      Go to any page at EverydayCheapskate.com. The home page has the three most current posts/articles right there at the top. Alternatively, you can click on the small orange search icon at the upper right (it shows up on every page.. and there are 1000s of pages!). That opens a search field. Type in a keyword or short phrase i.e. cake mix. That will give you a list of posts with that subject. Hope that helps!

      Reply

Leave a Reply

Want to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *