fearful woman looking out window

How to Keep Calm and Carry On

/30 Comments/in , , /by Mary Hunt

Life is uncertain. We know that. What we don’t want to admit is how quickly uncertainty can morph into fear, worry, and all-out panic.

Waking this morning to the reality of national unrest on top of a global conflict brings even more new meaning to uncertainty. In all of this, we’re supposed to keep calm? Carry on? Nice words, but how?

fearful woman looking out window

Fear is the enemy

Fear leads to stress. And stress leads to the breakdown of mental and physical health.

Fear skews our common sense, clouding our decision-making. Unfounded fears lead us to do and believe really dumb things.

Fear can so easily lead to depression as we rehearse over and over in our minds every possible thing that could happen. Fear and greed are very close cousins. Together, they can lead to panic, and that leads to no good!

Gratitude is the antidote

Gratitude, the conscious and heartfelt expression of appreciation and thankfulness, is the number-one best antidote for dissatisfaction, fear, and greed.

Greed says I must have more (are you thinking what I’m thinking—toilet paper!); gratitude counters with I have more than enough. Greed says the world is coming to an end; gratitude says I am so blessed. Greed steals joy; gratitude restores joy.

To develop gratitude, you need to talk to yourself and regularly write your thoughts. The idea is to begin to see all of life, including the difficult times, as challenges, opportunities, and blessings. I find it helpful to “reframe” a situation—to choose to see it from a new perspective.

Reframe the situation

Reframing can be difficult but is especially important when misfortune strikes. If you wreck your car, that is unfortunate. Still, it means you’re alive, and that is something for which to be grateful. And you get bonus reasons for gratitude if no one was hurt, you have a good insurance policy, or the car wasn’t totaled.

Authentic and heartfelt gratitude can hush up fear, insatiable desires, and negative attitudes.

For instance, you can hate your job, hate the boss, hate the people, hate the commute, and hate the work. Or, you can be genuinely grateful that you have a job.

You can learn to appreciate everything about that job, even the distasteful aspects because they build your character, tolerance, and compassion.

No matter what the situation, you choose your focus. If you choose fear, anger, panic—expect depression and misery. If you choose to respond with a grateful heart, expect hope, satisfaction, and joy. Yes joy, even in the midst of a global pandemic.

Make a list

Earlier this morning, I jotted down ten things I am grateful for today—right now, in the midst of so much uncertainty. Number one on my list? My certainty that God is in control. Right there, that calms my fears. Why should I worry?

The list includes my healthy family, KingSoopers is experiencing no shortages (I can order groceries online with easy drive-thru pick-up), grandson Eli has recovered from the final surgery following his ruptured appendix, and just finished his last doctor appointment.

I finished my list quickly and easily (you’re on it right there at #6) . With each entry, I could feel my spirits lift and a refreshing calm rush over me. We’re safe; it’s a beautiful day—and I’m ready to take on whatever lies ahead.

Your turn

Here’s my idea:  Stop what you’re doing and write down the  things for which you are grateful. But don’t stop there! Share your list in the comments below. How wonderful that we are so easily connected by technology (that’s on my list, too!)

Together, we will keep calm and carry on!

A desk with a laptop computer sitting on top of a table

 

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30 replies
  1. Denise says:

    My children–they’ve grown up from good kids to great adults (in spite of my)
    My husband
    I retired from a job I didn’t like!
    But I got a new one I do like!

    Reply
  2. Csandst1 says:

    God
    Family
    Our health
    My teenage kids like talking to me
    Thumbs 🙂
    Enough food
    Our house
    Colors
    Clean water
    We’re warm
    We’ve been able to pay our bills even though we’ve had no income for 3 years

    Reply
  5. Cally Ross says:

    Lately I’ve been reminding myself that no matter who’s in the White House, Jesus is in my house and still on His throne. I’m just visiting this world, my home is in heaven. 🙂
    we have so much to be thankful for! I’ve been reading about the persecuted church in other countries- quite eye-opening!
    I appreciate my healthy children/grandchildren, my husband of 38 years, my home, my job, my church family… I could go on and on!

    Reply
  6. Jenny says:

    My grateful list:
    GOD-my lifeline
    Loving family
    I am blessed with good health so I can(at 82)take care of my husband with his declining health
    Friends that lift me up when I let myself get down
    Good home with plenty of food and all I need
    Parents that taught me to love and trust God in all things
    My husband, who also loves and believes in God and was baptized at 81 years old.
    My Bible–my instruction for living
    Knowing, even through all these hard times, that God is in control
    Last, and certainly not least, for special people like you, Mary

    Reply
  7. Miriam says:

    Thankful for: That I can still attend a good church and the doors remain open (so far). That I have a Heavenly Father I can pray to whose door is always open come what may. That Jesus has promised to come back for His church, those who love Him. For the freedoms we still have, and, God willing, will continue. That I’ve remained covid free so far. For daily bread and clean water. Thank you, Lord, for ALL of this and much more.

    Reply
  9. Mandy says:

    Such a beautiful post today! I’m thankful that I can pray to God anytime and that He knows me and loves me; for family and a brand-new granddaughter that arrived on Friday, for my health and the health of my family, for the sunshine on a cold winter day, for food enough to share with others, for working vehicles that are paid for, for a home that protects me from the elements, for a cozy blanket to curl up with right now. I lost count, but thank you for helping my heart feel peace today! ❤️

    Reply
  11. GLenda says:

    Thankful for:
    My God
    Husband
    Kids
    Grandkids
    Roof over my head
    My warm bed
    My part time job
    My mom
    Transportation
    Technology since covid
    **And Your great ideas on living our lives better!

    Reply
  12. Karen Mandart says:

    I’m grateful I just celebrated my 70th birthday and I’m alive in this pandemic. I’m grateful I have a roof over my head and I can pay the mortgage every month. I’m grateful for a wonderful (though ailing) loving husband (of 35 years) who even sends to Europe for a candy I can’t get here. I’m grateful my son, daughter-in-law and 2 Grandchildren are safe and sound, (even though I don’t see them because of this pandemic). I’m grateful for “video chats” so I can at least see & hear my grandkids since I can’t hug them. I’m grateful I have a happy, loving dog of 9 years of age who acts like a puppy when we take him for a walk (in this very cold weather). I’m grateful I have a stocked pantry and can cook and eat anything I want and never go to bed hungry. I’m grateful we can donate to people less fortunate than we are. I’m grateful for the relatives and friends (who are like relatives), that keep in touch and are “shoulders to lean on” to keep me sane. I’m grateful for the sunshine on my face when the (cold) wind blows that chills me. I’m grateful for you, Mary and your column and for reminding me that I have a LOT of things to be grateful for!!! Thanks!

    Reply
  13. Pat says:

    In one way I am sad about the pademic and the virus but in others I am loving staying home. Working from home is awesome. I have painted the kitchen and laundry room and we have gotten a lot of maintenance done around the house. We planted the garden and I have started using my recipe book collection. Kids are getting homeschooled like I always wanted. I miss being able to go see my mother but I imagine in about two years we can fly again overseas. We only go out shopping once a week but since the goodwill is right next door to Kroger I still get to shop there to make me happy. It never closed down during lockdown as the governor deemed it an essential business. I loved that they had to take out advertisements on the radio to remind people that they were still open in March and April. I spring cleaned the house and donated a lot of items that we didn’t need. I have been so productive this last year. We were scared to death but we kept busy.

    Reply
  14. susan duzik says:

    Iam SO grateful for YOUR site/inspiring words, be it about life or how to save. I’m WAY into saving & probably have some ways I’ve never seen on here, lol. Mostly, wanted to say, Iam grateful EVERYDAY for your column…God Bless you Mary & thank YOU.

    Reply
  15. Linda Pries says:

    I don’t understand the people who are panicking over all this. The virus did not and does not concern me and neither does any political issues. I see what goes on around me and just deal with that. Politically I see our lives have a very high probability of becoming extremely more difficult this and future of years so I plan on preparing my life to deal with the insanity that I believe is ahead. Of course I am Christian so I know that whatever happens here and now is just a rung on the ladder and the best is yet to come.

    Reply
  16. Jan says:

    Things I’m grateful for:
    1. God’s faithfulness
    2. Sisters
    3. A roof over my head
    4. Food on the table
    5. Healthy family, kids and gkids
    6. Sun is out today!
    7, Birds at my feeders
    8. Tea
    9. Only 70 more days till spring!
    10. ebooks

    Reply
  17. Katie French says:

    Encouraging words from smart people 😉
    God is in control.
    I belong to Him.
    As Mary stated, I’m thankful for gratitude as it is highly effective medicine for the spirit.
    People who love me and whom I love.
    People who genuinely care about others and act upon it.
    When God (through His wonderful people) restored our home after Hurricane Florence flooded us. I’ll NEVER forget that and it’s really powerful encouragement for me.
    The opportunity to serve others and receive the joy it gives as a side benefit.
    My wonderful husband.
    My family
    Our health
    Our home
    Our food and some stored up
    The ability to communicate so quickly with others who are far away.
    Being able to help out a few 20 somethings.

    Thanks Mary

    Reply
  18. Deborah Sykes says:

    Thankful for my 10 things Thanks Mary for this reminder.
    #1 Gratefulto my God and his goodness
    #2 I have had health issues this past year grateful to be alive.
    #3 I have food in my pantry.
    #4 I’m grateful for a loving family.
    #5 I’m grateful for my home, soft bed, and all my comforts.
    #6 I’m grateful for my husband.
    #7 I’m grateful for the internet to learn and keep going forward.
    #8 I’m grateful for the changes of the seasons.
    # 9 I’m grateful for my friends that keep in touch with me.
    #10 I’m grateful to not have contacted the virus, grateful for a healthy immune system.

    Reply
  19. Dorothy Meyers says:

    1.I am grateful for the roof over our heads, the clothes on our backs, and the food on our table.
    2. I am grateful for the sunshine today… it’s been a while since we’ve seen it.
    3 I am grateful for our health… we had an encounter with Covid19 – my husband spent 18 days in the hospital, but has since come home and is doing well.
    4 I am grateful that we were able to spend the holidays together…for a while, it didn’t look like that would happen.
    5. I am grateful for the wonderful family and friends that we love and enjoy.
    6. I am grateful for the “maids” the dishwasher, washing machine, and dryer.
    7. I am recently retired…I am grateful for the extra time I get to spend with my hubby.
    8. I am grateful for the “live stream” of our Mass online…with his health issues, it’s not a good idea to go to church.
    9. I am grateful for the internet…even though at times it can be a pain.
    10. I am grateful for the blessing of my life… so many wonderful things in nature to see and appreciate…we had beautiful frozen fog on the trees this week…it was like big snowflakes covering the trees.

    Reply
  20. Jeneene says:

    I am very grateful for…
    1 my home is my own, paid off, and I love it
    2 my family and friends are safe and healthy
    3 I took care of my body and money so that at 75 I’m not worried about those things
    4 bloggers whose blogs I can read easily, without pop up ads or slides (like yours…thank you!)
    5 our new President and Vice President and senate
    6 my sweet cat who is very social
    7 Library books including audiobooks, all free!
    8 my woodshop that has allowed me to make a living right here at home
    9 my dance community, all eager to get back on the dance floor
    10 the Internet, which has allowed us to keep in touch throughout the pandemic

    Reply
  21. Don says:

    Hi, Mary. I agree with everything you’ve written in this column. I’m not going to list 10 things I’m grateful for, but I do want to share one thing. I’m old enough to retire now, and I deal with stress on my job much better because I can quit (retire) at any time, and never have to work at that place again, AND I don’t have to worry about finding another job that pays as much as the job I have now. Therefore, I’m much more likely to stand up for myself and voice my dissatisfaction if I think I’m not being treated fairly or if I think we could so things differently and get better results. And even though I rarely get my way, at least I’ve been heard and I haven’t bottled up those feelings and let them eat away at me. In fact, knowing what I know now, I wish I’d done more of that many years ago.

    I’m a hard worker, and a valuable asset to my employer. I’m not a perfect employee, and I can’t do everything everybody else does, but I know my capabilities, and I do MY job well. I deserve to be treated well in return. Years ago, I resigned several positions when stress overwhelmed me. Since then, I’ve learned that every job can be stressful, and if I’m going to quit anyway, I’ve got nothing to lose, so now I speak up for myself.

    Reply
  23. Connie E Clark says:

    !. Joy in God who I trust in this life and the next.
    2. My family are all well.
    3. I have a comfortable home, it is warm and I have wood to burn if I want it.
    4. I have food in the pantry and freezer. No starving here.
    5. Connection to friends, family and others is available through the phone and internet.
    6. Books are all around me, those I own and some from the library.
    7. Great sites keep me interested in other parts of the world.
    8. Income is regular and dependable.
    9. Plenty of yarn and patterns to keep my hands busy and make things for others.
    10. Nature outside my door is beautiful, peaceful and soothes my soul.

    Reply
  24. S says:

    It’s too late for calm. Notice the control over social media and emails. It was part of the dems plan. The worse is yet to come.

    Reply
  25. Dana says:

    My Gratitude list: 1) Jesus 2) my husband 3) my kids 4) my grandchildren 5) my mom 6) heat in the winter 6) USA 7) good friends 8) my needs are met 9) close loving family 10) garage door openers

    Reply
  26. Kitty Thompson says:

    Hi Mary. I’m grateful that God is in control, that my family is healthy, we have a paid for home, my business is surviving (barely). I’m grateful for you and your posts – you make my day! I’m grateful for my health, that today is my birthday (I made it to 74!), that I have great employees and my truck is working properly. Love you, and thanks again for all you do

    Reply
  28. Kathy Cuevas says:

    `1. Being raised in my Christian Faith
    2. God IS in Control
    3. My health
    4. My family
    5. My finances (will retire very comfortably God willing)
    6. My genuine desire to help others (financially and teaching my students to have a better financial future)
    7. My Job
    8. My marriage
    9. My Church/pastor
    10. All my blessings

    Reply
  29. Hijjo says:

    1. My good health 2. My family 3. My friends 4. My ability to love 4. My house 5. My ability to see that good can be gotten from bad situations 6. My spirituality 7. The beautiful county I live in 8. My social conscience 9. The belief that there are enough good people to make things turn out right 10. The Latino community in which I voluntarily tutor

    Reply
  30. Janet Lamkin says:

    Mary-
    Thankyou so much for your encouraging message. I needed to be reminded once again to be thankful in the midst of all the uncertainty in our country. I will continue to pray and trust that God is in control and learn. Janet

    Reply

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